On September 16, 2008, our lives were forever changed when James Wilson (J.W.) entered the world. He is a living miracle who has touched our hearts and revealed to us the greatness of God. This is his amazing story.

Friday, September 14, 2012

A heart full of emotions

I have been rather reserved in my social life after James went to be with the Lord nine months ago. We have been growing and finding our way in this "new" life as a family. We recently relocated. We wanted a fresh start. Not so much to run away from the past but have positive change for the future. 
From reading this blog previously, you know that James has two siblings. Tristin, 9 and Mitchell, 5. Our life was so chaotic since September 16, 2008 that we wanted a shift; a more relaxed life with time to focus on the children who were unavoidably neglected in many ways. I think we have found that. Great school, good people and less hustle and bustle (no Walmart down the street).
I am hoping, with the time I have now, to grow as a Christian woman, a mother and a wife.
There were many things that were set aside when it came to caring for James which was ALL of the time. But I tell you, the second I no longer had that blessing I felt empty.
James far exceeded the medical professionals' expectations. I always had a feeling that things would be ok but mostly doubted that feeling with, is THIS "THE TIME". Losing James was the hardest thing I have and probably will ever do. I worked so hard to keep this precious baby boy alive and didn't want to give up. God gives you the grace to let go when you humanly can't.
James' birthday is on Sunday. I haven't decided what to do yet. I want the kids to be involved in something special to thank God for the day James came into our lives. I'll be praying for the perfect thing to remember what a special blessing he was to us and everyone who knew him. I encourage anyone to write a special memory you have of James, I would love to read them.
I am eternally thankful for everyone who supported, prayed, thought, cried and laughed with us as we went through this journey. The journey isn't over. I am hopeful to help other parents going through a similar situation and to be an advocate in the name of James Wilson Taylor for children who can't speak for themselves.
Please pray for our family as we continue in finding a new groove that fits our family like James did.